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Adding value to life...yours as well as mine



Nov 18, '08





 

The first sentence that popped into my head as I typed this title was, "Gosh, I have cheek...!" This was followed by a feeling of grudging admiration mixed with a feeling of hopeless inevitability. Forgive me folks... I am in a grim... tongue lashing mood tonight. I feel like giving it raw... straight across the wind-pipe. If you are one of those who have a fragile ego... run for cover before it is too late.



I read in some book many years back... that the surest test of old age is to check your reaction to the youngsters. If you feel youngsters are silly, frivolous and plain down-right STUPID... then you had better accept that you are old. I mean really really OOOOOOLD.



But (surely you knew the BUT would surface didn't you..?)... BUT... wait a MEENUTE... Please...???



I don't think YOUNGSTERS are silly and frivolous. Not all. There are those that make me wish I had half their sense when I was their age... hell... they make me wish I had half their sense NOW.



No.. I am not talking of youngsters being silly and frivolous. I want to talk of PEOPLE being silly and frivolous. To tell you the truth the words I want to use for them are trite, brash, tacky and unutterably cheap. No substance... no coherence... not even the excuse of the inexperience of youth.



They are neither good nor bad... neither evil nor saintly... neither mean nor generous. They are in eternal competition... to be sillier than the rest... to be tackier than the rest... to be more obnoxious than the rest. What do they call it...? NORMAL..? Yes.. the normal... the average... I would call them the MINDLESS. Period.



Theodore Roosevelt said once...

Far better it is to dare mighty things, to win glorious triumphs, even though checkered by defeat and failure, than to rank with those poor spirits who neither enjoy much nor suffer much, because they live in the gray twilight that knows not victory nor defeat.



Poor Spirits... gray twilight...? Jolly old phrases those... he he he.... making me feel rather less peeved. The phrases are satisfyingly insulting and glaringly uncomplimentary. Good. Dear Theodore said some amazingly neat things, didn't he..? Hmmm... nice...!!!



They call themselves the normal and us the freaks. And you know what we do..? We do NOTHING. Zero. Zilch.



Why don't we..? Because we can't be bothered. We are too busy daring mighty things. We accept their judgment without opposition... each lonely in the silence of our souls. We perish silently.... most of us... each an island... not knowing of the existence of others like themselves. Not knowing that they are not the freaks.



I know I am making sense to you... that is why it is only to you I'm talking. The MINDLESS are deaf... as you know well. Neither you nor I can talk to them. They don't see us... they don't hear us. Their senses are not attuned to perceive us. By denying us the acknowledgement, they think they can deny us existence.



But we are there, aren't we..? We move and talk and think and love. We are SO alive. No wonder they tune us out. For we hold a mirror to them by existing.



The world seems to be in the grip of an orgy of mindlessness. I just want to state my stand.



I'll be damned if I'll become a part of THAT world. What about you...?



























Nov 09, '08





Hoax...? Yes...hoax. Believe you me, it is a far more hurting word than lie... or cheat... or deceive. You'll know it when it happens to you. Though I pray God it never does. It really is devastating.



There was a book I read once. It defined three discreet concepts. I had never put it as clearly in my mind before so I was very impressed. Actually it was something natural and ordinary. Somewhat like Holmes's deductions once they've been explained to the intellectually slower Dr Watson. No, I do not permit you liken me to Dr Watson. I just gave a handy example.



So this book said there are three situations connected with the concept of truth... corollaries sort of. The first is the truth, then there is the lie and then again there is the counterfeit. It is the counterfeit which is unforgivable. For the counterfeit pretends the truth. Which is worse than a lie. At least with a lie you know where you are. With a counterfeit you are lulled into an atmosphere of trust. And then comes the inevitable knife in the back.



Why this tirade...? That's because I want to introduce you to another character from the pages of life. Strap on your seat belts... here she comes. Yes... she. At Present she is about 35 yrs old... and she is a hoax magnet. This is her story.



She got married when she was 19. You know... one of those oh-my-parents-never-took-my-opinion-about-it-so-I-bowed-to-the-inevitable kind of horrors. No no... don't get me wrong. It was cute enough in the beginning.



Hubby told her he was doing well in his business AND had a part-time software development business. He had plans to work hard on the business until he could chuck the job. The business was in partnership... with him owning the machines and the partner providing the premises. Great...!



But then she is our hoax magnet, isn't she? She found out there was one machine... no partnership... and the 'premises' turned out to be a corner of the 'partner's' sitting room. Cozy...? Of course. He wasn't doing well in the job either. Against a salary of 6,000/ that she was led to expect... his first pay check of 1,900/ freaked her out. Then she knew she was up the creek without a paddle. But our magnet was a tough gal. She sighed and hung in there. Only, shortly it was just her left hanging... hubby was too busy demanding that SHE provide him with the grand life he wanted. She hung there 13 years. Then she let go... tired... numbed... fed to the teeth. Age..? Oh... she was 32. Best years of her life thrown away...



Would you agree this was a case of hoax...?



Enter hoax two. Stupidly, she fell in love with this one. I mean, the disease really had her in its grip. Inexorable... merciless... deadly. He sympathized with her... criticized the ex-hubby for being a lazy worthless bum... and promised her he would erase all unhappy memories from her heart. The earth and the moon and the stars...? Of course he promised them all... and more. Don't all lovers do that..? He promised two of them all... in the shape of more love than she would be able to believe possible... and marriage.



I have this uncontrollable urge to laugh... and to keep laughing until the world would stop spinning uselessly... mindlessly on its axis. Not that it would help the stupid dumb magnet.



Nope. Didn't happen. None of it. The love lasted an eternity as promised. Only he had a different scale than her. For him eternity got wrapped up in 3 months flat. Marriage...? Are you making fun of my magnet...??? Mean of you I think. Time line...? Oh... one year. She is now 33 yrs old.



Would you agree that this too was a case of hoax...???



By now she is like a zombie. Betrayal in first love DOES pack a nasty punch. She tried to kill herself a couple of times. Oh.. don't sympathize... she wasn't able to pull it. A hoax magnet... as well as hopelessly inefficient. I mean how difficult can it be to kill yourself...?? People do it all the time...!! Bah...!!!



Now... don't kill ME...! Its not my story... but enter hoax three. Though I don't know why I am feeling apologetic and ashamed on her behalf. I am merely the story-teller. Not my fault milord...! Did I remind you of some third grade hindi movie with thick glycerine tears and hamming thick enough to feed a family of four for a couple of years...? He he he.....



This one hailed her as his savior. Apparently... at least so he says... she brought him out of a depression a mile deep. Just with her sunny presence. Which personally I take with a sack-full of salt. The harder she pushed him away the closer he tried to get. She reminded him of his wife. But he would have none of it. I don't remember very well what... but he had a problem with the wife. Convenient...? Of course it was. It goes without saying that he promised her the earth and the moon AND the stars... Is this mandatory...? The promise I mean... not the delivery...? Must be methinks. The thing which really took her aback was for him to tell her one fine day that he was a one woman man. And his wife was that woman... and that he loved her beyond anything he could think possible with anyone else. No... she didn't slap him. I told you na... dumb woman. Time line...? 10 months... she is almost 34 by now... Have you noticed she is moving faster...? Talk of desperation.



I'll summarize the rest of it now. Even I don't have the patience to describe it in detail. Moreover, I am getting angry and want this to be over with. Hoax four borrowed 12,000/ off her and disappeared into the wide blue yonder. Time... 7 months. Hoax five lasted 4 months. No, I don't know what went wrong with him. I am tired keeping track. She called me today to tell me she has broken off with hoax seven. So I thought I'll write something truly brutal about her and send her the link. So this time she will put some more effort into her suicide attempt.



People like her shouldn't be allowed to live. They just clutter up the world. I read somewhere that we re-create on the outside a replica of the world we have on the inside. Guess she likes to be betrayed. Else she wouldn't have been such a powerful magnet.



I am so relieved this story is over... at least my part of it... because I hate writing obituaries.



























Oct 15, '08









CJ… had it been someone else who had tagged me, there is no way I’d have written this…. but for you… a thousand times over.



My mom studied in a residential school in rajasthan… place called Vanasthali Vidyapeeth. If you can believe it possible, she was wilder than I am… and a hundred times more rebellious than me. In fact, I don’t think I am rebellious at all. No… really…! I am not joking.

Anyhow, she did her graduation from there. If my grandma thought mum would be tamed by the stay in a strictly regimented institution, she miscalculated grossly. Mom came home with proof of the devastation she could wreak. The place was meant to be a jail… an exile… but it became her laboratory where she had conducted successful experiments.

I could go on about her exploits forever. But I had better get on with the narrative.

Needless to say, people like that have a massive fan following. She was no exception. People many batches after her would talk of her as if they knew her personally. She attained legend status.

About the time I was 12, we happened to meet a couple at party. They got to talking.. my parents and them. In the course of the conversation, it turned out that the lady had studied at Vanasthali too and was 5 years mum’s junior. But she knew mum… or knew OF mum I guess I should say.

The 2 families became close friends. The lady’s husband taught at the university and so was mum’s colleague. They became a second set of parents I had… In fact I became closer to them than to my own parents. They had 3 kids, 2 sons and a daughter in between them. The youngest was a year older to me and the eldest was 5 years older. I got along with the youngest like a house on fire… The oldest was a bit of a drag… too bloody serious for my taste… like the end of the world was coming any minute. I refuse to speak of the girl. I can bet you anything you like… that wherever she is now... she watches the K-serials like there is no tomorrow. Or maybe she plays the Saas in one of them… even then she had the raw talent. Talk of being a pest…!

After a year, uncle got an offer to go abroad for research and so they left abruptly… and left a huge void behind. I never expected to see them again.

Then they came back. 5 years had passed… I was 18 by then. They left the daughter (phew…) in college at Delhi and came back with the 2 boys. It was like they had never gone. I was going thru the roughest time of my life that time… and I really needed them around.

I got along with the younger son as much as ever. We would fight.. go into gales of laughter over nothing at all. The eldest became… if possible… even a bigger bore than ever. He looked all the time as if he’d swallowed a poker. Grim is not the word for it.

Naturally, I went over to their place all the time. Though they lived far from our place... yet I would go every other day on my bicycle. One such day… I was about to leave their place. It was getting dark and then it began to rain. Aunty wouldn’t let me leave. But I told her I would have to go… or it might get too dark for me to go alone.

She told the elder one to give me his wind-cheater… since that was all they had. He brought it and I tucked my shirt inside my jeans and put the wind-cheater on. It had a draw string at the bottom but I couldn't find the sting-end to pull and secure. So I asked him to help. He located it and tied it up for me.

The next thing I knew was that he was kissing me. It has been many years since that happened… but even today when I remember it... my heart leaves its moorings and lands in my mouth with a dull thud.

Don’t ask me how long the kiss lasted. I am clueless. I know it seemed like an eternity. By the time he released me… my lower lip was swollen as if stung by a bee. I pushed him away and ran down the stairs, picked up my bike and left as if the devil were after me.

By the time I reached home I was in a state… In addition to the intense emotional turmoil… my lower lip had turned purple. Why turmoil…? Ok… if I tell you… will you promise not to laugh…?

I was filled with a deep sense of guilt. I used to call him Bhaiya… like girls normally do in my part of the country. I couldn’t forgive him for doing something THIS wrong. Though I didn’t know the word for it that time… it felt like I- we- had committed incest.

This is NOT fair. You promised you won’t laugh…!!!

I didn’t go to their house for 10 days after that. When I did, I was told he had got admission in a university abroad and was leaving in a week. That was the last time I met him.

He left. His parents stayed here for 2 more months after that. Then they shifted to Delhi too. The nightmare of my life had left me in no condition to want to keep in touch with them. Later I found they had all settled in US.

I never saw him again. Don’t know where he would be. Or where his parents- my parents too in many ways- would be either. I miss them… I wish I had not stayed away from their place for 10 days.

But then these things happen. People come… people go... and leave a part of them behind in the form of a stamp on your soul. 

 


 









Oct 12, '08






I want to tell you a story again today. Like all my stories, this one too is a leaf from the pages of life... mine... yours... it hardly matters, does it?



There are two characters in the story. A man.. um... lets call him Deb and the woman... lets call her... Jenny. Though I've brought in Jenny... this isn't really her story. This is Deb's story.



Deb is an army doctor. Over worked and under appreciated. With a personal life about which the less said the better. He has a son on which he dotes. The solace of his life... the cornerstone of his existence.



But there is more to Deb than that. Army Doctor is an inadequate handle to give to anyone. It leaves out a whole load of vital things. What things...? Oh stuff... you know... personal stuff... what he is... what his STYLE is... What his THEME of soul is... That kind of stuff. Army Doctor. Yeah right...!



How does one define a love of life which takes one by storm just to witness? How does one describe an intellect which is sharper than one of Deb's scalpels..? How do I tell you of his utter total absorption- his complete OBLIVION- to the task in hand...? How do I explain to you the ease with which he could switch from one task to another and back to the first at lightening pace and no loss of momentum or concentration? How do I tell you that the feeling he gave one was that of being with a laser beam... powerful... accurate... focused..?



Can I tell you that even when drunk he would never show it at all? If there is an operation to be performed and I had a choice of doctors... one being a drunk Deb and the other a cold sober AVERAGE surgeon... I'd vote for Deb any day.



Enough about Deb. I see poor Jenny languishing in the corner.



Jenny... hmm... Now this is a bit more difficult. You know how it is, don't you? Average people are almost impossible to describe. Specially when one has had a laser beam directed into one's eyes... it takes time to see a 40 watt bulb. But I am being unfair. The contrast isn't all that bad. She is no laser beam our Jenny... but not a washout either. A 1000 watt bulb at least... hmm... good... 1000 watt is good...



The difference between the two was only of degrees of brilliance. In all the rest... they were well matched. At the most you'd say that Jenny gave one the feeling of living in the partial slow motion world of under-water. Her reactions a mite slower... her intellect a mite duller... her focus a mite diffused. But for all that... the THEME was the same.



They met ultimately. Actually... God maddens me...(Yeah I am digressing... if I can't rant in my own story... where will I rant...?) I have questions to ask him... pointed questions. I strongly suspect he will take a couple of years of sabbatical when I die. In the hope- mistaken of course- that I will have forgotten by the time he gets back... or will have been mollified. You think he is right...??? I agree with you. He SO doesn't know me yet.



They met about 20 years too late. Now don't say this was God's plan or I'll burst a few blood vessels. But they met. Yes. Naturally they clicked. They had to, didn't they..? What do they say in math...? Sub-set... superset... something like that. Ok.. so I never liked math though I am a physics postgraduate. Kill me.



When they met it was as if the whole world... at least the cocoon they were in... couldn't keep still for a moment. It pulsated with life. They talked as if they'd been walking on the burning sand for years and had now found the oasis they hunted for all their life. The beat of life... the intoxicating insistent crescendo... beat in their blood. Compelling them to dance.



I see you sliding back in you seat... relaxed... waiting for the happily ever after. I am sorry to disappoint you. There isn't one.



Why? That isn't an original question. This is one of those I want to ask God.



Because she hasn't much time left. What do they call it..? Malignant growth...? What a stupid expression. How can a stupid expression have the power to wipe out a life... that too this kind of an ALIVE life...? If you've heard anything more gross please do let me know. For me, this is the grossest it gets.



Three years. And he has to sit by twiddling his thumbs... and him a doctor. Cheerful thought haan...? Yeah.. don't you see me in gales of laughter..? Yes I am angry. I hate this. There are so many INSIPID people who could have been... Oh damn...!!!



Three years and a lifetime to live. I think sometimes that we are allotted our share of life... like candle wax you know. You burn it a bit at a time and make it last a lifetime.... For all your hoarding... you have most of it left when you are dying.... Or you burn it prodigiously and create an astounding flash... but you use it all up. Mostly, the second is better. No? Oscar Wilde says... Most of us go to our graves with our music still in us. Maddening thought... isn't it? I'd rather be played out and used up than leave half of my life un-lived... because I was too busy hoarding. Bah...!!!



Yes... this is how I console myself. You try it.. maybe it'll work for you too. It isn't working for me really. But I am trying.... real hard. And if you ever remind me that I am crying now... I'll kill you. I will... give me an excuse...!
















Tags: love, life, dance





Aug 23, '08




Her name was Sneh. All her life she tried to BE Sneh… really tried. 

What had she to show for the effort to BE Sneh? Nothing really. Or maybe that isn’t right. She did have 2 failed marriages to show for it. The fact that the marriages failed, proves that she failed to BE Sneh. What a sin…! 

Her name was Sneh. All her life she tried to BE Sneh… really tried. 

She was always an independent little beast. She was too opinionated and too much of a rebel. Like all rebels, she was idealistic. The idealism is not a bad thing in itself actually… as long as you keep it hidden… as long as you don’t throw it people’s faces. You weren’t supposed to walk your path unconcerned with what people expect of you. There is nothing that enrages people more… nothing that makes them resent you more. After all, if your brilliance becomes a mirror mocking me all the time how can you expect me to forgive you? 

Her name was Sneh. All her life she tried to BE Sneh… really tried. 

After her second marriage ended- in 3 weeks- she knew there was something wrong with her. After all two men couldn’t be wrong. So she decided to forget trying to BE Sneh. The deck was stacked against her. She tried to change herself. But then it never works, does it? All you manage to accomplish is to lose what little identity you have. What was her identity…? That she was Sneh? No... her identity was limited to just one sentence. 

That her name was Sneh… and she had tried to BE Sneh… really tried.... and failed. That failure became her identity.

Tried but failed. So she stopped trying. She decided to concentrate on her work. But she knew her terrible guilt. She was tainted. She tried so hard to keep herself cheerful. When she found she couldn’t…. she made a compromise with herself. She kept her dead and dying self hidden behind a false cheerfulness. She managed to get away with it… because there was no one close enough to look into her eyes and discover the sham. But she knew. She despised herself for living a lie every moment of her life. 

Her name was Sneh… and she had tried to BE Sneh… Tried and failed. 

Then he came. He? Oh yes…! He… you know… the twin. She had a twin? No no… tsk.. she didn’t HAVE a twin. When he came he wasn’t her twin. He was just one of the many people she met and parted with in the course of her days. She always fought shy of people… refusing to let anyone come close…specially men. She had still not forgiven herself. For What..? Oh....

That her name was Sneh… and that she had tried to BE Sneh… But failed. 

She didn’t get time to put up the walls this time. He stormed into her life. Two days was all it took. One minute he was on the outer-most periphery of her consciousness. The next thing she knew he had taken over. Taken over..? Yes… he took over… mind and body, heart and soul. It was as if she had been waiting for him all along. It was unnerving. She had never met anyone who answered her questions 2 steps before she thought of asking them… never met anyone who matched her appetite for life… or was as full of contradictions as she was. Their talk was something no one could have made head or tail of. They were constantly jumping ahead of each other knowing what was going to be said next and responding to that. He was the most life giving person she had met. She stopped short... and reminded herself...

That… Her name was Sneh… and that she had tried to BE Sneh… Tried and failed… but…. 

For the first time in her life, she felt alive. She was allowed to be as brilliant as she naturally was. She no longer had to hide it as a guilty secret… no longer had to slow her pace so that the MAN wouldn’t feel stupid. She no longer had to impose a death on herself by pretending to be an ordinary, predictable and dull. What do they call it? Normal. Is there any word more hateful than that? It was almost like saying that the sun had to be mild like a light bulb because its excessive brilliance hurt the eyes. She rebelled... and tried to forgive herself the unspeakable sin.....

That… Her name was Sneh… and that she had tried to BE Sneh… Tried and failed… yet… 

She met someone who was so strong that he didn’t feel threatened by her strength. He appreciated the challenge in fact. He didn’t treat her like a dumb woman. She felt secure in his respect for her. What an ordinary thing it is… to have someone treat you as an equal. It is ordinary till you thirst for it all your life and don’t get it. Her soul danced inside her. Every fiber of her being was steeped in a joy that defied description. She felt clean and light… no longer carrying the burden of another’s breath-sucking, mind-numbing expectation. He was her twin… and he set her free. She knew at last what Sneh was . 

Her name was Sneh… and now… she WAS Sneh… She knew why she had failed to BE Sneh all her life. How could she be… she had never understood what it was… for she had gone through her life LOVELESS. 

Now...? She was home at last....!











Jul 12, '08




All right sleepy heads. Wake up...!!! Game timeeeeeeeee....!!!

Give me the names of your top 10 favorite literary characters... and tell me what you like about them and why.

Howard Roark [Fountainhead, Ayn Rand] 

This is the hero of the novel. The purpose of writing the novel- it almost seems- is to portray the man. The story lives him... even when he is absent from the scene. One gets a feeling of breathlessness… waiting for him to come on the scene again… for HE is why the story is worth telling. 

People’s reaction to Howard is always in extremes… paradoxically because he is such an extreme character himself. It is this extreme-ness in him that I adore. He is so inflexible in his dedication… so focused in his work… so inexhaustible in his walking of the path he chose for himself. His assurance, his inner poise, his serene optimism are amazing. Actually I don’t want to use the word optimism… it is the wrong word. It means focusing on the positive…refusing to look at negative. What Roark portrays is the unshakable belief that there exists ONLY positive… that evil... by definition is excluded from the world… because the universe is a benevolent place. 

I find this world-view immensely empowering. It beats being worried all the time of bad things happening... of people jerking the rug off from under your feet. When it happens… we’ll deal with it… for evil is incidental… NOT to be taken seriously. 

Ellsworth Toohey [Fountainhead, Ayn Rand] 

Ellsworth is the anti-hero. The heroine Dominique says of him, “I love him. He is so perfect. He is a perfect blackguard. And perfection is rare in this world.” 

He is also my idea of what humans are NOT. Sometimes a contrast speaks more eloquently than a statement. But there is one more reason I love him. His understanding of the human psyche is amazing. He understands in the individual, micro-level and is able to project it to the group, macro-level… and effortlessly adds the salt of mob-mentality… to arrive at a perfectly understood social machine. A machine he manipulates at will. Only, he forgot the aspect of non-uniformity in human beings… the NON- CONFORMISTs… the crazy ones… the rebels… and so he LOST. 

Amazing. 

Dagny Taggart [Atlas Shrugged, Ayn Rand] 

She is the heroine of the novel and says, “Pain is not a valid reason for stopping.” All through the novel when I read the hardship she went through, this sentence went hammering in my head. I have read this book over 300 times in the past 24 years. I don’t know when I began telling this sentence to myself. 

This one sentence is the essence of her. She had the ability to get up and walk on… again and again… noticing nothing but the vision ahead. To be able to keep that vision vibrant despite all odds… because it is HER vision… and her life… and because she refused to settle for less…? WOW..!!! That one sentence has been my powerhouse. Walk on Dagny… your spirit is the vision in my eyes. 

Henry Reardon [Atlas Shrugged, Ayn Rand] 

He is one of the heros of the novel. Somehow when I think of him I have this vision of a figure carved in stone… looking straight ahead. He is the embodiment of STRENGTH in the novel. He is vulnerable… with the resilience of pure steel that he manufactures. He absorbs his pain within showing nothing on the outside. Inside, the pain eats away at him… yet his strength is such that he never shows the price he pays for being the one to protect others from pain. 

John Galt [Atlas Shrugged, Ayn Rand] 

Though He comes on very late in the novel, yet once he does come, one knows that he was there all along. He is the one that gets the heroine in the end and holds all the threads of the story in his hand invisibly. He is the one who demonstrates what it means to hold a vision and to walk towards it. He also demonstrates that we don’t pay the price when we walk on our chosen path; we pay the price when we don’t. We pay by means of the shame we feel for ourselves, with the disappointment, with the loss in self-esteem. He demonstrates that a just battle is worth fighting- and dying- for… and that there is no price too big to pay.

In the end, the joy of victory justifies all the blood, the gore and all the hours of loneliness of a solitary battle. He shows that any battle for achievement is fought within the heart and mind of an individual… The battle is not waged without… but within. The engagement is not with circumstances, but with our propensity to give up in the face of adversity… in the face of the seeming endlessness of the road ahead. He shows us once the battle within is won, victory is ours. I found that enormously hope-giving. Because of him, in the midst of adversity, I tell myself Adversity is a character-builder. This quells my doubts, restores my serenity and I walk on. 

Ellis Wyatt [Atlas Shrugged, Ayn Rand] 

Ellis Wyatt is the owner of an oil-well. Fiercely independent, blessed with a violent temper, brilliantly competent and a total inability to suffer fools gladly are his key characteristics. It matches me so perfectly [apart from the violent temper bit… which has mellowed only recently] that I feel I am observing myself moving on the pages of the novel. The thing I liked best about Ellis was when he held up a finger glistening with crude oil and told Dagny, “This drop of oil is mine. MINE. Have you forgotten what that word means?” (bold mine) Tell me honestly, is there any word more filled with pride? Is there any other word that can make you feel 10 feet tall? When said by someone who has earned the right to say that about the smallest, most humble thing, it is the sweetest word in the language. 

Scarlett O’Hara [Gone with the Wind, Margaret Mitchell] 

When I was reading this book, there was a point when Scarlett is lies to her sister’s beau to marry him herself. This unscrupulous behavior annoyed my strict mind… in which good and bad know their place and don’t jump into the same person. I was shocked and revolted. I remember complaining to my mom. She told me only that such is how it is and that I will begin to love her before long. And so it was. 

In her own way, she was no less of a visionary. She was no less a fighter for her values… so what if her values happened to be a southern farm? A dedication like that… a tenacity of that kind… that kind of love of life… excites nothing but admiration in me. She was a silly foolish girl that I wouldn’t want my daughters to become. But if they could become the woman Scarlett became… I’ll die in peace. 

Elizabeth Bennett [Pride and Prejudice, Jane Austen] 

Ms Bennett doesn’t need any introduction. Her loyalty to Jane, her objectivity regarding her family’s faults and her impeccable honesty to admit a mistake endeared her to me. And I loved it when she told Lady Catherine to buzz off… that she wouldn’t permit her to bulldoze her into an unreasonable promise. At the time I read the book… I was the original wimp who would have whimpered and given the promise demanded of me… and then to cry for the rest of my life… or cutting off my throat with a blunt instrument. [no Rampuri came into my life much later. MUCH. So…] 

Jason Bourne [Bourne Identity, Robert Ludlum] 

Technically, I ought not to include the character here. It is not the character I found fascinating… but the manner of his unfolding in the novel. Even after 15 years, I remember that… though not much else. 

Constance [The Constant Wife, W. Somerset Maugham] 

This was a play Maugham had written on the eternal theme of a man’s unfaithfulness to his marriage vows. She has been married over 15yrs and then finds out her husband is having an affair with her best friend. She doesn’t kick up a row. Because she thinks that as long as she is financially dependent on him she has no right to. I don’t really conform to the way she handled the entire situation… even what she did later was not something I would have done. 

She begins to work. After a year, she pays her husband her yearly upkeep. And then goes on a holiday with an old flame… naturally they travel as man and wife. And she tells his husband before she leaves… telling him also that she will return and continue to stay with him. Her point is… she has economic freedom… so why not sexual freedom too?? 

She sure was her own woman… standing tall on her conviction. Amazing. 

This concludes the saga. And now the best part… I am tagging ONLY 10 people… 

1. MarkIV 

2. Chithrajust 

3. Solarflare 

4. King-Bulls-Ring 

5. Swiftmove99 

6. Genius64 

7. Asylum 

8. InkTank 

9. GeetSudha 

10. Manisha Bhattachrya 













Jul 03, '08




Soooooo…. Here are the results. I know I am horrendously late announcing the winners. My net connection has been acting up badly… Sorry peoples. 

My votes for the contests go to Solarflare for contest one [no one can say I haven’t wooed him in a way that would melt the heart of a stone… but… him… ahhh…*sigh*…] and to brilliant King-Bulls-Ring. 

Since Fropper offers 3 prizes, and participation in the second were more numerous, I have chosen one winner from contest one… and 2 from contest 2. 

So… the winners are… 

Contest 1: 

Solarflare 

Contest 2: 

King-Bulls-Ring and InkTank

Congrats winners………!!!! 


Entries for contest 1 

1. http://www.fropper.com/posts/17683                  Votes--111 
[exceeded word limit…Disqualifed... Sorry Josh...] 

2. http://www.fropper.com/posts/17667                 Votes--11

3. http://www.fropper.com/posts/17666                 Votes--111 

4. http://www.fropper.com/posts/17661                  Votes--11

5. http://www.fropper.com/posts/17559 

6. http://www.fropper.com/posts/17540                 Votes--1 

7. http://www.fropper.com/posts/17528                 Votes-1 
[exceeded word limit..] 

8. http://www.fropper.com/posts/17518                 Votes--1

Entries for Contest 2 

1. Kidnapped; build bridges; war won; together... [solarflare]       Votes--1 

2. Revisiting childhood camp - activities: playing doctor. [wits-end]  Votes--1 

3. And they lived happily ever after [whirlwind200]                    Votes--1 

4. Chick born wingless, mother in cage [king bulls ring]                Votes--1111111 

5. Her fifth conquest ..... Went terribly wrong [shomeonly] 

6. Honk! If u are deranged [sazzyme] 

7. Can you see me helen keller? [saintnomuse] 

8. Silicon restructured, botox ironed; kinder mirror [asylum]      Votes--11 

9. Six words story wins the contest : pradip das 

10. She came, i melted, she conquered! [inktank]                              Votes--111 

11. Lost my Fly! But caught TROUT!! [swiftmove99]                            Votes--1 

Once again, I’d like to thank all of you for the participation and for keeping patient with the delay in results. I’d also like to thank Asy once again… and Dhaval… and Saint… for the fun they MADE on the contest post. Fun which had me in splits. Thanks guys… you rock…!!! 

Cheers, 

Dagny









Jun 29, '08




Here is the contest compilation. I know I was supposed to present it yesterday… but to tell you the truth, I was waiting for some more entries. I am really disappointed with the participation. I mean there were supposed to be 10 WINNERS. Instead, there are barely 10 participants!!! 

BUT… yes there is a ‘but’ here too. Though the participants were few in number… all those of you who DID participated… participated like the Billy-O…! In this regard I must mention Asylums’s contribution. She churned 6 word stories by the scores and made me dizzy with the sheer wit. They are all there in the comments of the previous blog. I wish I had many hats to raise to her. By quality and quantity… she would be winner. Kudos Asy…! 

*debating whether to say it or not, fearing Asy wrath. Decides to risk it anyway* 

Lubbs ya Asy…!!! 

*ducks under the table and pretends to be a chair* 

Entries for contest 1 

1. http://www.fropper.com/posts/17683 

2. http://www.fropper.com/posts/17667 

3. http://www.fropper.com/posts/17666 

4. http://www.fropper.com/posts/17661 

5. http://www.fropper.com/posts/17559 

6. http://www.fropper.com/posts/17540 

7. http://www.fropper.com/posts/17528 

8. http://www.fropper.com/posts/17518 

[Eight…!!?? Yikes………!!!!] 

Entries for Contest 2 

1. Kidnapped; build bridges; war won; together...

2. Revisiting childhood camp - activities: playing doctor.

3. And they lived happily ever after...

4. Chick born wingless, mother in cage.

5. Her fifth conquest ..... Went terribly wrong.

6. HONK! If u are deranged.

7. Can you see me helen keller?

8. Silicon restructured, botox ironed; kinder mirror. 

9. Six words story wins the contest.

10. She came, i melted, she conquered!

11.  Lost my Fly! But caught TROUT!!!"

[Sorry I missed the last entry folks. To the contestant... my most humble apologies. Owe you a dinner... ok?]

You must cast your votes so that we know which top 3 will receive the Fropper Prize. Those whose entries are here can vote... but naturally not for themselves.

Cheers, 

Dagny 

PS: Better play next time team…!??! Puh-leeeeeeej? 










Jun 23, '08




Dear Friends, 

Yes. The contest you have been waiting for… and the one I have been promoting until my eyes have gone cross-eyed… is here at last. I don’t know about you, but I am very relieved. I couldn’t have held it another instant. Talk of labor pains. Phew…!!! 

The contest is an exercise in creativity through concise expression. The rules of play are a bit numerous… though simple. Read on…. 

1. There are two contests; you might like to participate in one, or both. But can submit just one entry per contest.
2. For the first you have to use your blog space. To be considered for the prize, you must paste the link of your blog in the comment space of this blog. Don’t, I beg you, expect me to go hunting for your blog.
3. For the second, you have to write your entry and send it as a message to me. No, you cannot scrap it. Message ONLY.
4. Last Date for entries is 27th June 2008. Results on 1st July 2008.
5. There are no judges. You will judge the entries by casting your votes. No short-list will be prepared. (Yeah… the people I wanted as judges refused…. So there.)
6. The best part. There will be NO prizes beyond an announcement. If you don’t think that’s motivating enough for you to strain yourself… *shrugs*… don’t. 

UPDATE: GOOD NEWS PEOPLE. FROPPER HAS GENEROUSLY OFFERED TO SPONSOR THE CONTEST. THE TOP THREE ENTRIES WILL RECIEVE A FROPPER MUG AND A CD. WOOOOOOPEEEEEEEEEE!!!!

7. Top ten entries will be announced for both contests as winners. 

CONTEST ONE: My picture speaks 

I am giving here 6 pictures of holiday destinations. You can choose any one of them. I don’t know whether you are single, married, separated, single AGAIN… or… er… have some other orientation. I don’t even care what stage your marriage is in… whether you are…
a) Deliriously happy
b) Bored to tears at the sight of each other
c) Indifferent to the point of callousness
d) Slowly (or rapidly) verging towards homicidal tendencies towards your partner and spend your day dreaming beatifically of doin’ em in… 

(Though if you are desirous of finding someone on these fertile hunting grounds… indicating your status might help a bunch. No no… I am NOT suggesting anything here. Just trying to be helpful… you know… out of the generosity of my soul… Take it or leave it…! Jeeezzz…!!!) 

After picking one of the pictures, in not more than 20 words you must
say WHY you chose the picture as the ideal love tryst with the (current) object of your affections… your paramour. (And if you want to give their name… or zone name… be my guest. Give me something to smack my lips over…!). This, as I said earlier, must be done on your blog space… with a link here in the comments section. 

The pictures are at the bottom. And yes.. they move at will... so I will not be held responsible for their orientation.

CONTEST TWO: Short Story 

In this, you have to write a short story… a complete story… using ONLY SIX WORDS. YUP…!!! 

Examples: 

Baby shoes for sale. Never worn. -Ernest Hemingway 

Wasted day. Wasted life. Dessert, please. - Steven Meretzky 

Epitaph: Foolish humans, never escaped Earth. - Vernor Vinge 

It cost too much, staying human. - Bruce Sterling 

We kissed. She melted. Mop please! - James Patrick Kelly 

I’m your future, child. Don’t cry. - Stephen Baxter 

Lie detector eyeglasses perfected: Civilization collapses. - Richard Powers 

I’m dead. I’ve missed you. Kiss … ? - Neil Gaiman 

The baby’s blood type? Human, mostly. - Orson Scott Card 

Kirby had never eaten toes before. - Kevin Smith 

We went solar; sun went nova. - Ken MacLeod 

Don’t marry her. Buy a house. - Stephen R. Donaldson 

TIME MACHINE REACHES FUTURE!!! … nobody there … - Harry Harrison 

Lost, then found. Too bad. - Graeme Gibson 

Dinosaurs return. Want their oil back. - David Brin 

Bang postponed. Not Big enough. Reboot. - David Brin 

Temporal recursion. I'm dad AND mom? - David Brin 

Mind of its own. Damn lawnmower. - David Brin 

I saw, darling, but do lie. - Orson Scott Card 

H-bombs dropped; we all died. - Howard Waldrop 

I had a nightmare. He’s back!!! -Yours Truly

TO CLOSE: 

Only grown-ups are invited to the game. If there is ANY kind of moronic display… as on sgsweb’s space…. I will be forced to withdraw the contest.

Secondly, this is being played in order to play. NOT to serve as launching pad for anyone’s ego… mine included. 

Cheers, 

Dagny 

PS: No, Tough luck. It isnt Sangeet's B'day today. *sigh*

PPS: I am sorry the Pictures are not visible. To me they are visible at the end of the post... below this Post Script in fact. 
There will be ONE entry only for each conetst. BUT... you can post as many as you like in the comments. They wont be considered for contest... but you need not be denied the chance to display your creativity. Play on...!!!

PPPS: I wont be replying to individual comments. Yeah... so I am lazy. Lol.....! If you dont like the Pics... you can choose your own. No prizes for that. Lol...


 



 

  



 













Jun 12, '08




So here I am again with another game. This time it is not one but 2 games in one… and you either play both or you don’t play at all. You have to tag people in multiples of three only… minimum being 3 naturally.

The Naughty Tag (Game 1)

1. What is the first thing you notice about the opposite sex? Please no corny answers like his/her personality, we all know what we notice first :-)
My answer: His eyes… with which he looks at me.

2. Who- of the opposite sex- would you want to be with if you were deserted on an island?
My answer: I would have Loved the question if it had been WHAT would… *sigh* But since it isn’t…. OMG...OMG...OMG...OMG…OMG… there are so many options to choose from… shall I say HIM… orrrr.. HIM… no no… I think HIM… Cripes…!!! I cant decide…!!! 
Update: Celebrities have never held any attraction for me. Something... someone... who is out-of-bounds for me is too boring to even consider. Someone within reach is far more my style. To answer this question, I have to build a bit of background. 
The guy i'd like to be with is a figment of my imagination I call Deep. He ignites me... intellectually... and stimulates me in... ahem... all other ways. He is very practical- damn useful on a deserted island you know. He would get me off that island- I know that- and while we are there... there wouldnt be a single dull moment. For we have a plethora of things to exchange ideas on... and... err... do other things. I am sure I'll find him someday. You guys know anyone like that?

3. What turns you on about the opposite sex?
My answer: His intelligence, his reasoning, his humor.

4. What turns you off?
My answer: The kind of attitude which is articulated with... I-am-a-man-so-you-gotta-fall-flat-on-your-face-and-obey-me...!!! He he he... ME? WOW....!!! And RUDENESS? Oh dont get me started on THAT one.

5. Some Froppites have their real picture on the profile and some don't but just going by their blogs/ comments/ scraps who do you think is the hottest female (male bloggers answer this) and male blogger (female blogger answer this)?
My Answer: Well if he is so hot how come he has time being on fropper and isn’t inundated with women? He he he…. That’s a dishonest answer isn’t it? But if I give honest answers… who will protect me from the wrath of the ladies who think of these men as their OWN? No no… you don’t see ME sticking my neck out. Though I was dying to tell, truth be told. 
Update: There isnt one person I find hot... there are so many. In fact I have only hot guys on my friends list. The cold ones leave me cold... kinda. Ok... enough beating about the bush... The guys I find really HOT on fropper are:
1. Buddhasphere: (He got me to write the Koi Jab... series. He is a wonderful wonderful man... and I feel privileged to know him.)
2. MarkIV: (One of my confessed valentines. As for his eyes... oh they make me go weak in the knees... Dont kill me Vikram... please...! LOL...)
3. BrainyBakra: (New guy on the block... calls himself a goat... but is amazingly sensitive all the same. And I dont scare him either... which is what I like best about him...)
4. KBR: (Most of the times we are at each others throats hammer and tongs. Plz forgive the mixed metaphors.. nothing else was able to convey what I wanted to say quite accurately. I love my arguments with him.)
5. Solarflare: (He loves talking at a tangent... to understand one single sentence of scrap from him frequently takes me aeons of head-scratching. And even then I am not sure I got it. )

Now listen up peoples. I have answered ALL questions and am feeling extremely virtuous adn self-righteous as a result. Make your will if you have left any questions unanswered on your take of the game. No, I am not joking. I just had a brand new Rampuri delivered an hour ago. Oh yes...!!!!!



Bookworm Tag (Game 2)

RULES
1. Grab the nearest book you have been reading. And yes, when I say BOOK… I do NOT mean Cosmopolitan… or Playboy… or even Playgirl magazines. I am asking for words… not pics…
2. Open page 123.
3. Find the fifth sentence.
4. Post the next three sentences.
5. Acknowledge the person who tagged you.
6. Add the rules.

My Book: The collected plays of W. Somerset Maugham Vol 1 (Hardcover)
Page 123 – skip over first 5 sentences. Here are the next three sentences.

Mrs. Dot: Now I declare he wants to sentimentalize. Isn’t it enough that you have made me frightfully unhappy? D’you want me to say it doesn’t matter at all as if you’d spilt a cup of tea on me? D’you think I like feeling utterly wretched? 


Now for the carrot. All those who play this tag game get to participate in a contest I am dreaming up. Only I can’t decide on the prizes. Lets talk of something other than food. Man (nor woman either…) doesn’t live by bread alone. 

A friend… male of course… wouldn’t you know it… suggested I offer a kiss to the winner. Which made me hum and haw not a little… I mean… what about the women winners…? Eeeeeeeeeeek!!! 

One of you men want to co-host this with me? You are welcome to give suggestions in your comments… regarding the prize I mean… And submit your applications for co-hosting… in prescribed format… and in triplicate if you please… In small print also mention what you are willing to give me for allowing you the priveledge... No no... dont call it BRIBE... just a little something... you know...?

And now for the bestest part of the whole thing…. I am tagging: 

1. Sazzyme… Yoooooo hoooooo…
2. Chithra… Naturally……..
3. Sangeet.... Hey… come outta hibernation before the next one begins….
4. Manisha Bhattacharya… Your Buiscuit Baba is simply too cute for words… 
    Vidyut_Strikes...
5. Sonikudi… Yes… She is BACK….
6. Wits-end… C’mon wits… time to let lose….
7. Shome… Yoooooo hoooooo shomy…
8. Solarflare… If you don’t play this one… bas… we’re done… WHAT…? You are pleased… ? Damn…!!!
9. Saintnomuse…. He he he….
    Asylum...
10. Novacaine... The spontaneous player... 
     KingBullsRing...
     MarkIV...  
     Brainy_Bakra... 
     Sgsweb...



Lets Play FROPPERRRRRRRRRRRRR....!





Tags: tag, game, naughty, book